DEAR ALICE July 2026

DEAR ALICE

Advice from an Irish Mother

Dear Alice,

My father has been told that he has between 6 and 12 months to live due to aggressive pancreatic cancer. Despite being married to my mother for 37 years, he has decided to leave her. It turns out that he has been having an affair for the past 17 years, and he has gone to live with the other woman. I don’t know what to do or how to feel. Please help.

Ashley M. – Greensboro, NC.

Dear Ashley,

I’m sorry for your trouble. My heart goes out to you. The grief experienced from losing a parent is devastating. And grief is not something you get through or get over, grief is something you learn to live with. There is a lot of literature out there that can help you with that. Always remember that love is much more powerful than grief. And love your parents you must. The truth is, you will never meet someone clearer about their priorities than someone who has 6 months to live. Your father doesn’t have time to waste. He’s in love with a woman who is not your mother. Accept that because it’s not your business. That’s his business. He has to follow his heart. Don’t begrudge him that. Help your mother through this. She needs you. She’s losing the love of her life twice within a 12-month period. Be there for her.

Alice Gibney - Dublin, Ireland