ROAST of the Month - Lorena Alexa Sanchez

ROAST of the Month

Lorena Alexa Sanchez aka Cocktopus aka Fertile Fanny aka Little Big Pus aka YaYa aka LaQueefa

• Lorena conceived her first child on the night her IUD fell out of her vagina during a routine bowel movement in the pub bathroom.

• After the birth of her seventh child, Lorena vowed to stop thinking with her pussy.

• A graduate of Southern Lee HS, Lorena was voted “Most likely to require surgery to remove anal beads from her colon.”

• Her last babydaddy is the reason some animals eat their young.

• Her current babydaddy became her babydaddy when she found out he doesn’t have a job or a car, and he lives with his mom.

• She got her good looks from her dad, who is a plastic surgeon.

• “Yeah, I hit that. It was like fucking a dead fish.” – Ryan Minton

• Most men love Lorena for her personality. There are ten to choose from.

• Her husband is deployed, her boyfriend lives at home with his wife, and her fiancé lives in Charlotte.

• Alexa – what does ‘throwing a hotdog down a hallway’ mean?

• Alexa - what do you call a woman who likes to have sex while her ex-boyfriend listens on the phone?

• Lorena Sanchez is a beautiful, intelligent, and talented young woman who is a great mom, a great person, and a great musician.