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Employee of the Month

Kevin Trevor Marshall

aka Dick ~ aka Dong ~ aka Duck

  • Kevin’s real name is Brandon, but he prefers Kevin because he doesn’t want to be confused with “pussies” like Brandon Love or Brandon Baggett.
  • He looks like a guy who hangs out in the parking lot at Panera Bread or Barnes and Noble looking for gas money to get home to his eleven kids.
  • Kevin can be quite shy at times, but he’s always willing to discuss his problems with hemorrhoids.
  • As a gender non-conforming, non-binary, horny bastard, Kevin would fuck a snake if you held its head.
  • Kevin is one hairy cunt. The last time anyone looked for lips through that much hair was in 1972 when Joe Creech was losing his virginity.
  • According to Kevin, soreness and redness are common after a back, sack, and crack, and should not be confused with an STD.
  • Being a black man with a big dick is difficult for Kevin since it consists principally of dealing with ditsy white women.
  • He might not suck a dick, but he’ll keep one in his mouth ‘till it goes soft.
  • Erections are often painful due to Peyronie’s Disease that developed from an injury in sixth-grade gym class.
  • Persona non grata at Secret’s Cabaret due to a “misunderstanding” with one of the strippers during a private dance.
  • Kevin is an absolute gentleman – approachable, kind, honest, fair, courageous, a man’s man, and a faithful friend if you’re lucky enough to call him a friend.

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