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Employee of the Month
Christopher Villalobos
aka Dick Stroker aka Shaggy aka Phalange aka Pinky aka Wolfey
- It all started with a routine Sunday afternoon wanking session.
- You can’t tell because of plastic surgery, but Chris was born Richard “Dick” Stroker, in Muff, County Donegal, Ireland in 1934.
- Chris’s first words after being promoted to the Paddy’s Security Team Lead Position were, “You can lead a horse to water, but a pencil must be lead.”
- Sexual favors such as hand jobs, blow jobs, and reacharounds will no longer be accepted by Chris as entrance into Paddy’s in lieu of cash. He is in a serious relationship at the moment.
- Chris’s revolutionary, new, left-handed, wanking method called, The Wand of Magic Missiles, has helped him develop abs down to his taint.
- Since earning his white belt in Jiu-Jitsu, Chris walks around every day with no idea what it’s like to fear another man.
- Chris is nurturing, sensitive, sweet, supportive, gentle, warm, humble, affectionate, tender, emotional, kind, devoted, and understanding. He likes long walks on the beach, deep conversations, candlelit dinners, romantic comedies, Dungeons and Dragons, and alternative lifestyle parties. In other words, Chris is a Jeep owner.
- Chris is an advocate of Titan Strength Supplements – for thicker and tastier sperm, with enhanced volume and explosive ejaculation. 60-day money-back guarantee.
- His favorite Dad joke is, it’s easy to convince ladies not to eat Tide Pods, but it’s harder to deter gents.
- Chris Villalobos, an American patriot, is a kind and humble man, a loyal and dependable friend, and a much loved and respected member of the Paddy’s family.
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